Posted in Being the wife, It's a God thing

When I became known as “Tim Feder’s wife”

190767_4884051321_9831_nAs the title might suggest, no I am not writing about our wedding day. If you want to know how that went, come over and watch the DVD with my girls – they’d love that 😀

Today I was thinking about where Tim and I started in ministry together and well- if you’ve ever asked the question, “where did you guys meet?” you’ll know the answer. Tim and I met in church – both musicians at the time (YES! I am one too, would you believe it) and our bands collided and after a few cold shoulders and shy glances from across the stage – magic happened and we’ve never looked back. Well maybe to reminisce but…..agh you know what I mean. So Anyway, we’ve been together in ministry ever since we met and our hearts have constantly come into alignment about where we sense God leading us.

Back then, it was a blur of hormones, politics and starry eyed dreams and no Facebook to record it all #oldschoolbaby. So for todays walk down memory lane, there’s no actual photo to mark the time period  (because I honestly couldn’t find one-thus the wedding pic) I’m going back to when I decided to step off the stage for a season. It was mainly due to me not being able to handle the politics and keeping my mouth shut gracefully – a personal choice and also one to save the band from all being offended by my swift, unfiltered self. Pre-marital had helped me realise that my strong personality needed to take a step back and lead from behind closed doors or as it turned out – behind the computer screen doing lyrics for Tim.

Once people realise that I’m a muso, they often ask me, “why aren’t you playing with him?” and to be honest I haven’t felt the urge to step back beside him yet. It will happen one day and I have never regretted this move. But when I did that, I had lots to learn and it’s amazing how important it was for our relationship going forward or else I don’t think this ego of mine would have managed leading in the lime light beside him. Now that I look back, that decision marked the start of when I became known as “Tim Feder’s wife” – a title I hold dear and often as my way of explaining how I fit into this world, when I meet someone new.


I'm a woman finding my way through life as the wife of Tim, the mom to 3 growing kids and trying to maintain some sort of self through it all. I hope you enjoy reading how I journey with my troops through this thing we call life.

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