Hello lovely human beings – let’s grow. As an upfront disclaimer, prepare yourself for some hard talk. Right now we have to not care if we completely loath the way we look, or what we feel like in our own bodies – I’m of the opinion that once we became parents, there’s certain parts of us that aren’t about us anymore. In fact, not just certain parts – a lot of parts, because in order to raise the next generation well – we have to lead by example. (but, if this does trigger you, please look into those feelings and talk to someone. It can only make you grow and become a fuller and more healed human being)
Ok, so like I said – let’s put on our big people underwear but I’m not saying that our insecurities aren’t valid and our history is null and void, and that we have to have it completely together. No darling, dish about that stuff with your adult friends. But what I am saying is that we have to become so much more aware of how we envelope our “stuff” around our little humans.
I remember being a new parent – when we got pregnant for the first time and honestly, I thought I had it all worked out. Read the books, apply the techniques and all should be well. Right? Don’t sit there and pretend like you haven’t thought that at least once – parent or not – we’ve all been through that phase of “I could do that, what’s the big deal? It can’t be that hard”
Honestly, with our first little human – I thought I had it waxed. The kid did well with the techniques we applied and we’ve enjoyed every bit of the journey. Why am I writing this part first, you may ask – well after having that sense of “we’ve got this” all of these years, laying the foundations and relationship building blocks there after – I am now at a place of “what the heck?”
I know that your birthday was yesterday and to be honest it was a lot of fun – just like you. There is so much that has happened in one year and I so wish we had cameras following us every day to record the amazing things that you do and say.
Over this last year you have taught me – as your mother – to trust my instinct even more. You have taught me to be decisive about decisions with your needs. I have learned that your well-being is priority over just “hoping it will get better”.
So we’re back and we get to move ahead with therapy. For those of you that are new, I previously posted about finding out about our daughter’s foot development. So this is the first official update. Yay! She doesn’t have any fusion of the bones on the ankle and so this means we get to enjoy the short version of therapy. (Which I’m so glad for) Those that know our princess – she has walked around bare foot since she was a little itty bitty princess. Having her wear shoes all the time is going to be a challenge for sure. But this is obviously a sacrifice for the greater good of her physical development.
I had this whole basic intro ready, but I feel I need to share the heart of why I’m posting this about our sweet 10 year old. You see, all too often I’ve come to learn that if I (as the parent) don’t take note of certain things about my child, and don’t do something about it – it could potentially impact their future in a way that could rob them of pursuing their dreams. There’s a gut thing that women have that can’t be explained (sorry boys – it’s a legit thing) where you just feel something isn’t right and you can’t explain it. Honestly, I had this feeling with our Iraina for years and I am so glad that I acted on it when I did. Here’s what’s been happening.
Have you ever met someone and just know that this person is “my kind of people”? Well, this next Mom could literally have been cut out of my heart and soul and put into another human. I literally resonate every time I read or talk to her about something.
She has a generous, gentleness about her and yet she’s spunky and confident about where she’s at in her journey and her own person. She also exudes parental wisdom like a life giving spring. We too, met at a “blogger event” and I immediately did the same thing I did with Nicole from our previous episode – I trolled her like a hopeless teenager because she was so darn interesting. #fangirl
I don’t know about you, but I am really enjoying this series and part of me kind of wishes I could ‘binge read’ it…. Right? But, good things come to those who patiently scroll and ingest in stages.
If you’ve ever met me in real life, I have probably got into your bubble and asked a really personal question and got to know you quite quickly – do I remember your name? uhm, I can try to do it, but I have to talk to you longer than 4 minutes to really get it squared away in my mental files. The mom that I’m about to swing the doors open on today was at an event that I went to and she turned out to be a fantastic companion beside me, about 2 years ago (yoh! I can’t believe how time has flown) – and her name stuck because she is such a peaceful soul.
Before I introduce the first mom that has taken the time to share her story, I want to give a little back story about her and how I came to get to know her so that you guys can feel like you’re part of our friendship.
I remember attending a wedding in 2006 (I think) and there was this bottle blond bombshell of a young lady sitting at the back of the church while the rehearsal was happening. My hubby was playing at the wedding and as it turned out, the bride is a mutual friend of ours. She was (then) the bestmans’ girlfriend.
The one thing that stood out about her was her mellow confidence. She has a gentle beauty that obviously caught the eye of her then boyfriend and now husband.
Throughout the coming years we had occasional interactions – nothing major – but I remember we were at said mutual friend’s house for a birthday party and my oldest was attending and my second princess was a little person. This mom had just had her first princess and was in that “fog” that we all go through – ‘bone tired and just making it through the day’ stage. We compared notes and had fantastic heart to heart mommy conversations – now this was the interaction that I think describes her to a T – transparent, real and nothing hidden, in the best way possible.
I don’t know about you – but I love learning from a person like that.
This is it! I’m finally getting what’s been in my heart out onto a page for all of you to read and journey with me…… or should I say us?…… through.
I remember when I was a new parent, even a newlywed, having all of these incredible women around me that I could look up to and ask questions and tap into for the knowledge I needed for those very precious new moments in my life. Those women have always been there, even to this day and I value their experience and their advice, input and example. They have helped shape my thinking as a wife, mom and woman.
Over the years, Timothy and I have found that our relationship has cruised along quite swimmingly. This year, April 2020 marked our 15th year of being married and we’re happy to say we’ve survived many a high and low. But at the beginning of this year, we came to a point of realising that we need to stop taking it for granted and truly investing in our relationship and connection.